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Hysterical Historical Commentary of Obviously Oblivious Political Pontification

http://www.politico.com/story/2015/06/hillary-clinton-roosevelts-political-families-118504.html

No other political pundit has made the obvious moribund comment… or inappropriate analogy… about Secretary Hillary Clinton’s geographical choice in her re-launch of her foundering campaign….

So… we will….

Not only was Roosevelt Island formerly known as Welfare Island… but for much of its history… the island was intentionally isolated…. Quarantined…. Healthy humans were not allowed on to the island…. The only inhabitants were housed in three Tuberculosis Sanitaria… to remove and isolate the sick… from the healthy….

The most notorious inhabitant was Typhoid Mary… who was essentially imprisoned there… because she refused to stop putting the public at risk… and refused to stop working as a cook… despite the fact that her gall bladder was a reservoir for Typhoid… and she was a documented carrier… who was unaffected by the terrible disease she carried… and spread….

I seriously doubt Secretary Clinton… the poor soul… who was only rescued from the thrall of abject profligate poverty… by the narrowest of margins… and the largess of the Qatari Princes… and FIFA… via the Clinton Global Initiative….

No. Just like all of the other men and women who have been arrested in the scandal say… it was not a bribe…. It was a legitimate investment….

A kind gift….

A kind of gift….

A CERTAIN kind of gift….

The kind of gift that all such prostitutes receive….

A payment in kind….

As someone who once ran for Sheriff in Jones County, Mississippi… repeatedly… said….
I don’t SELL moonshine…. I just trades it for money….

Hillary… and Send-ME-the-Billary… seem to have shining faces… and shining moons… this political season….

That is certainly Democratic Nepotism in the save vein as President Andrew Jackson….
Not quite the Constitutional Democratic Republicanism that Thomas Jefferson envisioned….
(Not William Jefferson Clinton… the one man-whore who made sexual abuse of power an executive privilege… while his wife and political supporters engaged in wanton victim blaming… while Slick Willie serially dipped his wick… and took a constitutional on the Constitution…. The Thomas Jefferson who wrote the Constitution….)
Not quite the statesmanship and moral fortitude of Republican President Abraham Lincoln….
Not quite the Progressivism of Republican President Teddy Roosevelt… who was also raised in exquisitely elite isolation…. The Clintonian Democratic Liberal Progressivism and Faux-Populism may be a bit too hypocritical to taste or smell like Teddy’s Populist Progressivism during his Bull Moose Party facade… but they’ve got the smell of the bull down pat….
Maybe it’s more of a Bill Moose Party….
I’m sure they’ll appeal to tons of women….
Bill’s always appealled to bimbos….

Sanitaria…. Asylums…. They perfect place for Hillary to kick off her race….
Again….

No questions, please….

A Commercial Pronouncement….

Do what the Big Woody tells you to do….

Wright-Wang Extreme Mystery, Inc.

Found a harmonica that not only stays in tune with a tune, but also stayed in same key as both my playin’ an’ the rest of the band…. I personally… or impersonally for that matter… endorse this here harmonicky…. This is the Harriest Potterin’ Harmonicky Granger I’ve ever set my lips on and blowed…. Makes me feel like Ingrid Bergman in Casablankey…. No ‘scuze me…. I gotter go wet my whistler with some of that SUpremely sweet iced coffee from over at the Pho Shizzle located at the Faux Seasons Hotel in exotic downtown Whistler, Mississippi (Beat Four if’n yo’ kin folk….) So jus’ pucker up ‘n’ tell ’em Big Woody sent yo’ runnin’….

Signed,
Big Woody Johnson
Guest Harmonicophonist on Mico, Mississippi Moanin’ Stroll
World Renowned Studio Musician and Main Star Big Woody Johnson & his Big Johnson Blues Bandits

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Talkin’ ‘Bout… Mico, Mississippi Moanin’ Stroll (Dedicated to Fresh Cow Patty….)

Not REALLY snarcasm, but not TOO far off….

Wright-Wang Extreme Mystery, Inc.

First of all… Fresh Cow Patty doesn’t really exist….
Not as any actual… REAL… person….
Of course… in Mico, Mississippi… there are a tremendous number of fresh cow patties….
So… in some sense… particularly the sense of smell… she serves as sort of an… EVERYCOW type of character… like from those ancient Mystery Plays….

Second (of all, too, probably…)… Mico, Mississippi doesn’t really exist either….
Not NOW anyway…. It DID exist…. Even had a Post Office….
But… not anymore….
Sadly….

The song is basically just a Blues riff/chord progression… with some frills….
The idea behind the song was to study how to use percussion to add some excitement and keep a repetitive song from becoming SO boring that it puts people to sleep inside of three minutes….

Also worked on using harmonica comping to create some excitement and sustain the song as well….

Briarwood acoustic guitar tuned in Open D…

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Explaining… THE Ultimate Untitled Lost Love Song….

Yeah…. More SNARCASM!!! Mix in a stew with some bitter irony….

Wright-Wang Extreme Mystery, Inc.

More snarcasm cleverly disguised as social commentary….

The “lyrics” were written to maximize the irony when contrasted to the music… which was in no way sad….
Except for the distorted and flanged Lap Steel Guitar at the end… that intentionally moves out of key… to introduce a dystonic element intended to set one’s teeth on edge….

The bass drives the tune….
Several layers of guitar… that progress towards more intensely distorted and flanged varieties… again to test how much one can toy with emotions… without the need for words….
The lead work is basically pentatonic minor progression with bending….

Not really a serious piece….
Unless you’ve been in the situation….
Then… you just GOT to laugh it off….

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Notes on Julia (MAX Distortion D-Mo’ version)

Explaining… snarcasm….

Wright-Wang Extreme Mystery, Inc.

Julia is a love song. About teenage love….
With lyrics like… Walk on cotton-candy clouds… Lips sweet as wine….

The version as recorded is Punked OUT!!!
Plethoric with SNARCASM!!!

Rocking out with bass… some pentatonic guitar work… and some chromatic elements as well….

The riff is moving semi-tones to give the song a very dystonic… deliberately delinquent… quality….
Add a HEAP of distortion… and flange it like the songs on FIRE!!!… and throw in vocals that are intentionally off key and off tempo… and ya get… SNARCALICIOUSness….

All THAT song needs is some more cowbell….

Because no snarcastic social commentary song can EVER possibly have too much cowbell….
Just can’t happen….

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Notes on Beautiful Ewe….

Wright-Wang Extreme Mystery, Inc.

I guess we’ll just call the key E major….
And claim that the we used an extended Blues scale… into the province of Jazz….
Don’t ask the chords. We don’t know….

Noodling around last night… and found some interesting sounds… that sounded almost… chime-like….
Pensive….
Introspective….
Pastoral….

Lots of open strings…. Lots of ringing….

The idea for the some is something like a Madrigal….
A call… and a response….
Experimenting with Stereo….
Try listening with headphones… if you’ve got’em….

Playing with harmonics at the beginning….

Practicing Finger-style acoustic guitar….

The composer… the Mad Russian… doesn’t sound a bit mad on this one….

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Mico, Mississippi Moanin’ Stroll (dedicated to Fresh Cow Patty….)

Wright-Wang Extreme Mystery, Inc.

Tuff Scuffle Ranch Rustlers + rEd nExXx….
We Still Ain’t Got No Durn Album….
Composed & arranged (as always) by BaHR (Russian-2-Judgment)….
Recorded at the Chicken Coop Recording Studio just South of that Jasper County, Mississippi line on Highway 15 North in beautiful downtown Shady Grove….

Sounds like they were working on percussion….

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Chicken Coop Ramble (Chicken Coop Recording Studios Demo version

Not much to say on this one.
Promised these boyz that we’d record ’em if they actually learned a song….
This is what they came up with….
One chord….
G….
For a banjo tuned in G… nothing to fret….
Not a strang….
Not. A. Thang….

Chicken Coop Ramble….
The Tuff Scuffle Ranch Rustlers featuring rEd nExXx….
“We Ain’t Got No Gol-dang Dad-gum Album Yet!”

Seems like they also ain’t got a clue….

Shady Grove Stomp (Early Moanin’ version)

Well…. Just a bit of history….
Digital Underground had 2-Pac….
They also had Shock G….
Who had an alternate identity… sort of like Superman… or Batman….
That entity… called himself Humpty-Hump….
And… he had his own dance….
The Humpty Dance….

So… the Southron Rap Assassins burst into the Chicken Coop Recording Studio just North of serene downtown Shady Grove on Highway 15 North… just a tad bit shy of the Jasper County line… and demanded that they jump EVERYBODY else… and record their new… song….

So… hear it is….
The Southron Rap Assassins + Dr. JAY!-OH!-nAY! K-ash Mo’-nAY!….
From their new album… sans Big Woody Johnson & his Big Johnson Blues Bandits….
Tryin’ to Dye Our Grey Southron Roots….
The Shady Grove Stomp (Early Moanin’ version)….

Crosscut Saw….

Wright-Wang Extreme Mystery, Inc.

Just a tiny bit of an issue here at the Chicken Coop Recording Studio located just a tiny bit North of the legendary Tuff Scuffle Ranch… in beautiful downtown Shady Grove, Mississippi…. The VERY Heart of the Deep South….

Actually… it’s really a BIG deal….

First, blues legend B.B. King died. May he rest in peace.

And after being hit by that tragic news… Big Woody Johnson showed up….
Big Woody feels… well… like both that Big Woody… and all the Big Johnsons… are being neglected….
They feel slighted. Devalued. Overlooked. Ignored.
Because they believe… that the Collective Intelligence at Wright-Wang Extreme Mystery, Inc….. the entire staff… and the rest of creative and recreative and procreative and even the destructive elements at Wright-Wang Extreme Mystery, Inc. and the Chicken Coop Recording Studio staff have been totally focused on this here new-fangled rabbit music that’s nothing but a bunch of noise…

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